"Hello,

I have a confidential business proposal for you. Before proceeding, let me introduce myself to you.

I am Captain Williams Woods with the United Nations troop in Iraq, on war against terrorism. Based on the United States legislative and executive decision for withdrawing troops from Iraq this year, I have been deployed to come and work in your country's military base soonest. Our mission is to help beef up terrorist targeted states, mostly the United States and the European Union on the war against terrorism. I believe you will maintain the trust and confidence of what i am about to reveal to you.

I have in my possession the sum of USD16.2million which was recovered from one of our raids on terrorists here in Iraq because they keep most of their money at home for evil activities which they normally get through illegal deals on crude oil and arm dealing. Based on the suffering we undergo here some of us do meet such luck. It happened that I went for this raid with the men in my unit and I decided to take it as my share for my stress here in this evil land filled with suicide bombers. I deposited this money with a RED CROSS Agent informing him that we are making contact for the real owner of the money. It is under my power to approve whoever comes forth for this money. I wish to use this money for charity purposes in Turkey, where we have about 3 million Iraqi refugees and Sudan where we have currently the highest numbers of refugees displaced as a result of war. You need to visit such places.

I want to invest the money on stock fish from Norway to this refugees because base on my experience on battle ground in this places, they lack a lot of fish and meat to add to their meager and unpalatable meals which they get in little quantity just to keep them living until God knows when the problem ends. Instead of allowing these terrorists to get the money and spend it on purchasing arms illegally from Russia and North Korea it is better channeled to saving the world. I cannot move this money to the United States because I will be in Europe for about 3years, so I need someone I could deal with on trust and that is why i contacted you. If you accept, I will put you forward as the beneficiary of the funds and transfer the money to you in Europe because as a uniformed person and I cannot be parading such an amount so I need to present someone as the beneficiary.

I am an American and an intelligence officer and I have a 100% authentic means of transferring the money through diplomatic courier service .I just need your acceptance and all is done. I have the logistics for that so you have nothing to worry. Please if you are interested in this transaction then I will give to you the complete details you need for us to carry out this transaction successfully as all you need is to follow my instructions and directives. I decided to find someone that is real who i can trust and that is why I went to a secured car site where I can be sure that the person is real.

I believe I can trust you. Where we are now we can only communicate through our military communication facilities which are secured so nobody can monitor our emails, then I can explain in details to you. I will only be able reach you through email, because our calls might be monitored, I just have to be sure whom I am dealing with. If you are interested, then let me know so we can proceed as time is very important to me. If no response from you after 3 days, then i will look for someone else. I am doing this on trust, you should understand that as a trained military expert I will always play safe in case you are the bad type, but I pray you are not. This money is my life and i am willing to give you 30% of the total sum when the money arrives under your custody.

I wait for your response so we can proceed immediately. In less than 10days the money should be in your safe custody, and then i will come over to meet when we are out of the military base.

Do get back to me with this information;

1. Your full name
2. Your contact addresses
3. Your phone number directly

Regards,
Captain Williams Woods
"

This was so funny I thought it would be worthwhile posting in in its entirety...I wonder if there really is a Captain Woods:

I have in my possession the sum of USD16.2million which was recovered from one of our raids on terrorists here in Iraq...

The Chinese rotating table is a cheap take on Russian roullete, no?

Yes I had to laugh how creative this people are just hoping someone would fall for such twisted stories...I am always imagining someone typing these things in an African internet cafe while smoking some mind altering concoctions...

BRITISH HIGH COMMISSION
Metro Plaza, Plot 991/992
Zakari Maimalari Street
Cadastral Zone AO,
Central Business District, Abuja.

Attention:
The BRITISH High Commission in Nigeria, Benin Republic,Ghana and Burkinafaso received a report of scam against you and other British/US citizens and Malaysia,Etc. The countries of Nigeria, Benin Republic, Burkinafaso And Ghana have recompensed you following the meeting held with the Four countries' Government and various countries' high commission for the fraudulent activities carried out by the Four countries' Citizens.

Your name was among those scammed as listed by the Nigeria Financial Intelligent Unit (NFIU). A compensation has been issued out in Certified Bank Drafts to all the affected victims and has been already been in distribution to all the bearers. Your draft was among those that was reported undelivered as at on Friday and we wish to advise you to see to the instructions of the Committee to make sure you receive your draft immediately.

According to the number of applicants at hand, 184 Beneficiaries has been paid, half of the victims are from the United States,we still have more 37 left to be paid the compensations of $2,500,000.00 USD each.

Your particulars was mentioned by one of the Syndicates who was arrested as one of their victims of the operations,you are hereby warned not to communicate or duplicate this message to him for any reason whatsoever as the U.S. secret service is already on trace of
the other criminals.

So keep it secret till they are all apprehended.Other victims who have not been contacted can submit their application as well for scrutiny and possible consideration.

NFIU further told us that the use of Nigeria and Ghana Couriers was abolished due to interception activities noticed in the above mentioned courier services in Benin,Nigeria and Ghana and thereby have made a concrete arrangement with the DHL Courier Company for a safe delivery to your door-step once the beneficiary meets up the demand of the conveyance.

We advise that you do the needful to make sure the NFIU dispatches your Draft on Friday.

You are assured of the safety of your draft and availability. Be advised that you should stop further contacts with all the fake lawyers and security companies who in collaboration scammed you. Get back to me immediately to check if the delivery date suits you.

Yours in Service,
Mr. John Simmons

what will they think of next? you have to laugh at this one:

...I didn't know that the F.B.I. was normally in this business.

Only when they tell you to drop by to collect the prize in person ...

In that case, I'd better pack a toothbrush, eh?